The 9 stages of tantric lovemaking

In Tantra love making is not just a physical act but a journey that has a start,beginning and end.
Although yoga and meditation are invaluable tools to help increase personal awareness on one level it is helpful to be able to distinguish between the different stages of being intimate with our partner as by fully immersing ourselves we not only fully engage with our partner but increase our own awareness whilst replenishing our bodies with life force energy also which will increase our overall health and well being.
The different stages are shown below:

Preparation
The space should be prepared ahead of time,with all the senses catered too,this will help to take your partner out of their intellectual mind and fully into their body. Be aware of the temperature,scent
 and texture plus color of fabrics in the room.before prepare your mind and body to fully co join with your partner.

Consecration
Make the commitment to yourself and your partner that you will integrate yourself fully in the experience.

Energy of the beginning
This is just for couples who are already established,but over time the beautiful energy and feelings once felt have been lost or declined in daily living. Try to bring back the memories of when you first met,feel the chemistry and the intensity of that first touch then incorporate that into your love making.

Transfiguration
This stage forms part of a cycle transforming our basic erotic needs to the connection with our heart and whole being. It celebrates the different polarities and the meeting of yin and yang it is not just connecting with the genitals but the entire body.
This cycle works as follows generally as men are more physically led and women more emotionally respecting the strengths of both Shiva and Shakti. The man sends his energy to the woman's genitals through his thoughts and breath,she then feels that energy and moves it up her body so it can connect with her heart changing the connection from physical to emotional,the energy is then transferred directly to the mans heart,he then takes this highly charged and loving energy and transfers it back to the woman's genitals completing the cycle. The reason for this cycle instead of just keeping the sexual energy at a physical level is so we can step away from our own ego and limitations forming a much deeper connection with our partner which will be felt and in turn transferred back strengthening the relationship.

Foreplay
This is vital for both partners for different reasons. Women generally need between 30-40 minutes of foreplay before their bodies feel safe to open up erotically,the reason that many women have never experienced a full orgasm is because their bodies were not fully awakened before lovemaking.
For men foreplay is essential as he learns to not be fully consumed by his own ego and desires and learns to slow down so he can control his urges and sexual energy therefore prolonging the sexual experience and fully satisfying himself and his partner. Many men have a fear that if they do not use their erection straight away they will lose it,however what they do not realize is that what sustains their erection is having continued arousal through the erotic energy created. If a man can awaken a woman's energy enough the intense energy created he can sustain his erection for many hours and the mans urge to ejaculate will diminish as he learns to connect to his heart and not just his genitals.

Lovemaking 
It is advisable for the man to practice sexual continence( not ejaculating) in order that he can preserve his own energy plus by indulging his own pleasure too soon a movement of energy is created which is too powerful to control leading to ejaculation before either party are ready. If the man can remain  connected in his heart and not just his genitals  there are no urges to ejaculate therefore expanding the capacity of the love making and creating mutual satisfaction between the partners.
Many men do not realize that there is a difference between orgasm and ejaculation and they feel that if they do not ejaculate they will not feel pleasure. This is not correct,in fact by ejaculating they actually deprive themselves of feeling the pleasure of full body orgasms as after ejaculation the body is depleted of energy so the pleasure is short term,during tantric lovemaking the absence of ejaculation means the pleasure is build and increased gradually leading to much stronger sensations and the full pleasure whilst still preserving the life force energy and improving overall health and virility in the man.

Postlude
Following a lovemaking session embracing your partner allows the awakened energies to be fully present which is not only extremely reassuring to your partner but very nourishing for the couple and ensures a stronger heart connection.

Sublimation
This stage is very important following a love making session as there has been a huge build up of energy which can settle in the genital area. If this energy is not polarized and moved to the heart any underlying problems between the couple can re surface as if the energy is not moved it can create sexual frustration.

Avalanche
The final stage is learning techniques to harvest the energy created,this is done by consciously separating for a short period of time so that each partner can amplify their own energy building strength and vitality. It is beneficial for all couples to spend some time apart as by doing so the connection can actually get stronger as they as individuals gain their own strength and do not have to rely on their partner therefore nourishing the relationship as opposed to feeling consumed by it.

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